I’m sitting in a cafe near Jimbaran beach. The air is thick with the humidity of rain but the clouds haven’t opened up yet to release their weight.
Bali is like a mystical portal into a world of enlightenment and awakening… If you allow it to be. There’s something special about this place that’s hard to describe. It’s like all the non-tangible things in life… something deeply felt but unseen, a knowledge and knowing from within.
Riding on a back of a scooter is both the most frightening and exciting bodily experience I’ve had in a long time… Comparable to my bungee jump experience in South Africa. Ha!
The streets are busy, lines on the road are loose suggestions, and you often find yourself staring into oncoming traffic and in the wrong lane before dipping in behind a car to let oncoming cars go by.
The people are peaceful. You can feel mixed energies as you walk through shops, sit in the restaurants, or dine on the beach. There are the people here to numb out and drink before going back home to their lives. And then there are those that are here to crack open. Those that are here as part of a larger journey.
Tapping into that energy is… Indescribable.
I went into the ocean the other day. The ocean used to be my biggest fear, and after living in the Cayman Islands for a few years, I decided to conquer it. I started slowly be snorkeling… and by the time I left I’d become a certified diver. I was so proud of myself for tackling my fear head on.
But the other day, I had a call with my spiritual mentor Deanna Deacon. And when she told me to go in the ocean, I felt the old tightening of my chest and fear I thought I’d released so long ago.
I head down to the beach, set up a towel, and let myself breathe into that anxiety.
As I stepped into the ocean, I immediately burst into tears. ALL of the fears I’ve been feeling, all the insecurities I’ve been suppressing, came bubbling to the surface with the waves.
While I cried, I asked for support. Help. Healing. To be embraced to move past all this fear and step into my purpose. To be empowered as I continue to lean into my life’s mission.
The truth is, healing is a forever journey.
We grow so much as we learn life’s many lessons… Some of them are painful. But when we choose to embrace healing… When we come out on the other side that’s where the magic happens.
How do you lean into healing?
I love to write my younger self letters. Here’s my letter I wrote today to my 15 year old self… ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
“Oh baby, you’ve got a long way to go. You are going to grow a lot right now. It’s going to be so painful. The expansion is going to leave marks. You’re going to desperately claw and cling and retreat back into yourself.
But know that comfort isn’t going to serve you long-term. You’re just beginning to stretch your soul from child to woman, hurrying to catch up to this body that’s outgrown you.
You don’t trust yourself. It’s going to take so long, too long, to start loving yourself for who you are and trusting that you are enough. ⠀
>> YOU ARE ENOUGH << ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You don’t need to be anyone other than who you are already, right now, deep down. ⠀
The woman you are becoming is an absolute power house and she’s already in you. She entered 2019 with explosive force. She’s open. Awake. Aware.
She’s present for herself. And she’s capable of incredible things.
You’re a leader baby. You’re meant to change lives. It’s going to take hurt and healing to recognize that, but just know… you’ve got you.” ⠀⠀
What would you say to your 15 year old self knowing what you know today?
If you’re anything like me, you couldn’t even imagine the woman you were becoming back then.
This year, I’ve built my dream business…
Manifested dream clients…
Manifested my first 5-figure client deal…
And helped my clients do things like break 5-figure cash month goals, create client attraction systems, design authentic brands that light them up, sell out group programs, get a waiting list for their one-on-ones, and more…
Are we meant to collaborate as you transform into your badassiest boss woman this year? Unleash the Influential Woman is open for applications. I look forward to inviting my soulmate clients to their next level.